The internet has backed a woman who says she is considering leaving her husband because of problems with her sister’s “ugly” boyfriend.
my sister in law is so nice. i hate her reddit
She explained that the 26-year-old couple had been together for 10 years and had two children.
“My sister is my role model, like my second mother,” one woman wrote in a now-deleted Reddit post. “She was a successful architect and was very beautiful. Tall, slender, with a beautiful face. Wherever she went, people quieted down and turned their heads to look at her.”
Her older sister started dating a new boyfriend two years ago, the poster reads: “He is a construction worker, uneducated, poor, fat, has unkempt red hair, is about 4 inches shorter than her, and doesn’t wear high heels.”
“Everyone was surprised at first – except me, I thought he was brilliant,” she explained. “They made fun of my sister behind his back, thinking she was wasting her life. Later, when they realized that my sister was happy and truly loved each other, they supported me.”
But while the rest of the family embraced the relationship, the poster’s husband was less than enthusiastic about the man. “My husband still hates my sister’s boyfriend,” she said. “He doesn’t understand why my sister is with him, and he’s furious that her boyfriend is moving into her beautiful city apartment soon.”
Leanne Leonard is a licensed marriage and family therapist with Mindpath Health. “Conflict often arises in families when there is a lack of mutual understanding and willingness to resolve the conflict, especially when irrational behaviors and reactions are displayed.”
Whenever they were together, the poster appeared annoyed and upset, and frequently brought up his problems with his boyfriend. It was difficult for him to understand her husband’s point of view.
His reaction to her sister’s boyfriend made her worry that he might have feelings for her sister.
“I was so upset and asked him if he liked my sister or why did it bother him so much? He told me not to make a fool of myself because she was 10 years older than us,” she wrote.
Worried about his dishonesty, the poster said she felt she had to leave her husband.
“In reviewing the description of the man’s behavior, I think the problem was the man’s jealousy and feelings of inferiority,” Leonard suggested.
Online, others agreed, with one commenter writing: “Either he’s in love with your sister or he’s showing some insecurities about his appearance.”
“I advise wives to confront their husbands about the underlying issues that fuel his anger and disdain for his boyfriend. Instead of discussing his crush on his sister or dislike of his boyfriend, talk about what is going on inside this man that is causing the anger and confusion?” Leonard said. “If this is a behavioral pattern, then it’s time to consider third-party interventions, such as marital or individual therapy.”